I choose not to feel!

I choose not to feel......!

The line is the latest muse that I came across in the recent edition of the star trek movie. A few of my close friends might have already got where such conversations of mine can lead to! The line is by Mr. Spock, the half vulcan and the half human who is constantly torn in between his emotional human side and the logical vulcan side. Many a times he sounds rather robotic and perfectly analytical, and the way he vents his emotions is worth a look.

I was pondering on this line and realized we do have a choice to feel. In our daily lives, the game of choice starts every morning when the alarm wakes us from our dreams. If one can break down time and observe things, its simply amazing how this game of choice works. Each choice in our lives, opens up a whole universe of opportunities not only for us but a lot of people all around us, to sum it up each choice we make has a huge butterfly effect! Having said that, the choice to feel can be strongly related to the emotional being inside your brain. We undergo a lot of emotions both consciously and unconsciously, sometimes we aren't even aware of that fact. We humans, have the ability to control our feelings to a certain extent thanks to the societal norms for that. But, many a times we are let to wonder what to control and what not, now this is again a big choice we need to make. As I said earlier each choice has repercussions over a period of time, thus the choice to feel depends on the depth and width of one's imagination. Luckily for Mr. Spock, he is portrayed to have a profound understanding of the logical sequence of events that are likely to occur depending on a choice and judgement he makes. Thus he says, "I choose not to feel."

For mere mortals like us with a limited understanding of the world, is it really justifiable to say the same? Can we choose not to feel for the people around us atleast the people we consider close? There are a lot many questions which cannot be answered by our limited human logic, but there might be a moment in time when the intelligence and rationality overrules the emotional nature and compel one to make a choice to feel or not! And I hope such moments come with a greater good in the offering. :-)

BIRTHDAY'S!

      Birthday's always amused me over the years and they still do. Many a times I wonder, what is that special feeling or emotion that brightens the eyes of most people as soon as their birthday arrives. Off late many of my close friends in their late twenties are off colour with the idea of yet another year passing by. Though personally I haven't been a great fan of celebrating birthdays lavishly, I prefer to spend my birthdays in the company of my family or doing something new and interesting.

      Recollecting my school days and moments from childhood, birthday was always a wonderful day as a kid. You start to feel special and all the kids around become your friends for the day! I am not trying to point at that piece of cake or the basket of chocolates which gets one all those friends, but my main idea is to understand the belief system with which we all grow up. The beliefs that are inculcated in us over the years are so strong that we often forget their very existence. And ofcourse who can ignore the gifts that one gets on the birthday, now that is the greatest catch which might make many stick to those beliefs, isn't it?

      As I grew older, I kept observing things over the years how the number of people at any birthday party follows the famous bell curve and once a person reaches a certain age (varies from person to person) he/she doesn't bother about his/her birthday anymore. Last year, I called one of my friends for the birthday and to my amazement all that friend said in return for my wishes was,"Good that you remembered, but I don't find my birthday all so happy anymore, it just keeps reminding me that the clock is ticking and its ticking fast!" Though my friend didn't sound sad or unhappy, there was a certain degree of confidence and coldness in the voice which said, "Buddy, now happiness is sought after in a variety of other things than throwing lavish parties on birthdays." 

      The best of the conversations I had about birthdays was the one with my grandmother, she needed to be reminded that it was her birthday. I asked her, if how she feels on her birthday and she smiled at my question and with all the love and affection said, "I don't know if how old I am now, In fact it doesn't matter anymore. At my age, birthday's just come and go, and I am very happy that all you kids are doing well."

      My romance with the natural distribution of events and things is all so stirred up with such conversations and experiences; imagining the wonder in the eyes of a kid, the zeal in the voice of a young person and the love in the words of a granny, I try to explore the universe of my own emotions and ask myself.... 

"How important are Birthday's?" 

:-)